Wednesday, September 06, 2006

Alone is a lonely place to be

Heavenly Father answers prayers! And here is how I know:

So I'm single, and usually I can deal with that ok. :) But last night I went to the apartment of one of my dear, dear girl friends, to hear about her weekend. See, this boy that she has liked for two years flew in from out of state to spend the three-day weekend with her, and FINALLY, after two years of close, close friendship, initiated a dating relationship with her. :) :) :) So last night I got the dirt on the weekend, and rejoiced with her. Good times. :)

And then on the way home in my car I started to feel really lonely. See, for the last year I have had three main confidants, two male and one female. And within the last month or so, culminating with last night, all three of them got, shall we say, "attached." So even though I am happy for all three of these dear people - and I really am happy for them!! - it was a little hard last night to feel like one, two, three, bam, bam, bam, and I have lost all my geographically close people-you-go-to-when-you-can't-go-to-anyone-else- because-they-know-you-and-STILL-love-you. 'Cause when you're a girl, and your guy friends get attached, things have to change between you. And then this girl friend got attached, and I felt really alone. And I prayed and asked Heavenly Father for support.

And then today, just now, the friend that I talked to last night called, and told me that she was really glad to have been able to tell me about her great weekend and new boyfriend :) and that I was one of the people she had REALLY wanted to tell about it, and she expressed to me how much she values our friendship, and just basically reassured me that she wants us to continue to be really, really good friends. And even though as I write that it sounds so cliche, I trust her and I believe her and it was sincere, and I needed it and I cried. And after I hung up I realized that that was an answer to my prayer. And I cried again.

7 comments:

Lauren said...

Are we secretly sharing the same brain or something? Because....oh, my goodness, I get this. Like, read back three or four cryptic entries in my blog -- I SO get this right now. And I'm so right there with you. And praying for you. As always. Xo!

Josh said...

Um, Margaret, I think I should also tell you that you're one of my closest friends, and that your advice lately has been some of the most needed words in my life. You're one of my best friends, and you always will be. If you ever need to talk I hope I'm still there for you like you have been for me. You're awesome.

Nantie Meg said...

You are so great. I can definitly relate to how you're feeling. I'm so excited I finally got to meet you in person. And I'm excited to get to know you better. Thanks for sharing.

Danielle said...

Margaret,

Can I just tell you that I really needed to hear this....

I have been feeling the same way, girl! I, too, have been feeling lonely. Why is it so complicated - You want the VERY BEST for your friends, and relish in their joys and successes, but, for some reason, it is hard to squelch the pangs that come from missing them as they go off and soar the skies.

Hmphf! And here I've been thinking that I'm just a ridiculous, selfish little thing, when really I'm just a girl who loves her friends and needs a little companionship. Wow! What do you know, I'm human!

I love that you said Heavenly Father answers prayers. He truly does. On Sunday, after seeing you, and aftering Melissa, I cried myself to sleep. I was soooo happy to see you both. It was nice to catch up with two of my closest friends. So, I cried because, well, I love you both, and then I cried because I felt lonely in my big house, with no one to pray with, or hug, or just "be" with...

And then, last night, when I was studying my scriptures (and I studied them for HOURS because I really needed the comfort) and then I read this blog and realized - WOW!!!! I really am blessed. I have such good friends, and so now I'm crying because I wish I could just wrap you (and Melly) in a giant hug, kiss you on the head, and tell you "I love you!"

NoSurfGirl said...

I think you're really cool. Be MY freind!!!

I promise I'm not going to find a new boyfreind anytime soon ;P And I promise not to ask you to babysit.

Jenn said...

I would love to say that I have some profound thought to add to your blog about being alone and lonely and realizing that you are really not all that alone--and maybe I do have something to say about it. See lately, I've been realizing how very much NOT alone I am and how much Heavenly Father loves me and wants me to love myself too. And it's hard when you see so many people finding someone else who makes all their dreams come true and realizing that YOU might be the one making your own dreams come true and that's ok. It's good to not rely on others to direct your life and make the decisions, but on the other hand it's come to the point (especially in the last few weeks) that I've really wanted someone there to confide in and then it hit me that I DO have someone there--who has always been there. And as I come to know Him and trust Him more I've become more confident in myself and in finding my own special relationship. And it will happen--I know it. Now, I just have to believe in myself and my worth and try to see myself the same way Heavenly Father does--because He knows everything about me and STILL loves me! Isn't it amazing?

On a side note, I wanted to tell you that your pictures is way cute! :)

Heather from One Woman's World said...

Please oh please oh please come hang out with me. I'm so glad that your prayer was answered. FYI, I spend almost every evening alone. I would LOVE to hang out with you.