Thursday, August 02, 2007

You can call me Pinkie, but I won't respond.

So I have pink eye, and in order to give you an accurate picture of what it's like, here's a picture of what it's like:

And wow - that just really doesn't capture it, the redness, the swollenness, the bloodshotness, you can't really see it that well. But it's there, oh, it's there.

Let's try again:
How's that? NOW do you feel sorry for me?!

And here's how you might be able to understand what the last few days have been like for me:
  1. You know when you are sick, and you blow your nose, and it comes out all yellowish-greeny? That's what the gunk looks like that is coming out of my eyes. I wiped it out before I took the above pictures. You're welcome.
  2. And when you are sick and you blow your nose all the time, you know how your nose feels raw from being blown so much? That's how my eyes feel. Yeah, weird.
  3. Women - you know when it's that time of month, and you wake up in the middle of the night with a sure and certain knowledge that if you don't get your body vertical in less than one second things will get REALLY bad? Well, that happened to me last night - but the leaking was out of my eyeballs.
  4. You know when you have tears in your eyes, and the water from your eyes kind of hovers on your lower eyelid and makes it kind of hard to see, and you have to blink to see through it? Yeah, it's like that, but the liquid in my eyes isn't clear, it's...well, see #1.
  5. You know when you have tears in your eyes, and you don't want to wipe them, and you tip your head back to keep the tears from falling on your shirt? Well, I do that. But it'd be WAY worse if THIS dripped on my shirt than if tears did; see #1.
  6. You know when you stay up all night and your eyes burn? I have that feeling all the time, even though I didn't stay up all night.
  7. You know when you drink a lot of water, and then you have to keep getting up to go to the bathroom? And then you get back to work, or whatever, and 5 minutes later you think, "What?! I have to go AGAIN? I just went!" That's how it is with me with wiping the gunk out of my eyes. I wipe it out, and then I wash my hands (because - EWW!), and then I sit back down, and then 2 seconds later my eye is all blurry again and I endure it as long as I can, and then I have to get up and go wipe the gunk out again and wash my hands again. Sigh.

So really, people, good times, good times. And in case you couldn't tell, I have it in BOTH eyes. That's what I get for having 2 sleepovers in one week with 4 nieces and nephews who ALL have it.

And I'll buy you a candy bar of your choice if you can come up with a good caption for the pictures of my eyeballs. Here's mine:

Don't attempt to read all 7 Harry Potter books in one sitting.

P.S. I went to the doctor to get eye drops for this lovely condition, and he came into the room looking at my chart and said, "So you have pink eye, eh?" And then looked at me and said, "Looks red to me!" Apparently if you are a doctor there is no reason to resist the obvious one-liners.

P.P.S. And just so this post isn't a TOTAL downer - the medicine has been helping. :) And I'm going river rafting with my family tomorrow! And I went to a family reunion last week and hung out with some of Kati and Kari's kids - cuties! And I looked through all my France pictures the other night, and I got some GOOD ones! If you're nice, I might even post them... ;)

7 comments:

KATE said...

Oh sweetie, I am so so sorry! Really sorry! I know that it absoluely sucks! I feel your pain, it will get better, the drops do help, keep up on them. As far as keeping them cleaned out, I just keep a warm wash cloth to wipe them out. I know it's no secret remedy, but there really isn't one. Sorry!! I hope it feels better soon!!

KATE said...

Okay I obviously can't spell, as I demonstrated above. A warm wash cloth sounds really lame. But honestly, really warm it helps soothe, and a very soft wash cloth. I promise it will get better soon!! - Kate

Unknown said...

oooh... you are good. This really really gives me an idea of what you're going through. My eyes are seriously itching right now, and I feel a need to go for a kleenex and just make sure there isn't anything sludging up my vision---

Dude-- colloidal silver. Spray form. Good earth. Eight bucks. Every couple of hours.

Worth it.

Danielle said...

OH MY GOODNESS!!!! I hope you feel better sooooooooooooon.

Here I was rambling on gchat yesterday and you were suffering from pink eye.

eeeew!!!

I'm glad you went to the doctor (even though he was being a dork).

FEEL BETTER!!!!

Love ya!

Danielle said...

PS: Glad to see a blog post. It's been... aeons! :)

Janell said...

Yuck. I've had pink eye in one eye or the other quite a few times over the years, but never in both eyes at once? Yuck. Yuck Yuck.

Good luck =C I hope the medicine keeps working its magic!

KATE said...

HOw are the eyes? How was river rafting? Where did you go? Was it so fun? Hope so!! - Kate